paganpaul: (Gallifrey)

And in other news, it looks as if I will be working on saturday and sunday. And this is not on a farm.
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paganpaul: (Default)
When I drove home today I was passed by a German car. Now, this happens often so no surprise there.

But the license plate was.

I assume the car came from a town called Bitburg or Bittenbach or so, as the first three letters on the plate were BIT. In Germany a license plate is bound to the area where you live.

The entire license plate made me laugh madly...

BIT-CH 67.

Isn't that a bitch...

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paganpaul: (Default)

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paganpaul: (Rare mensen)
Reported in the Newcastle (UK) Evening Chronicle recently.

Be sure and cancel your credit cards before you die! This is so priceless and so easy to see happening - customer service, being what it is today!

A lady died this past September, and MBNA bank billed her for October and November for their annual service charges on her credit card, and Then added late fees and interest on the monthly charge. The balance that had been £0.00, now is somewhere around £60.00.

A family member placed a call to the MBNA Bank:

Family Member: 'I am calling to tell you that she died in September.'

MBNA: 'The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply.'

Family Member: 'Maybe, you should turn it over to collections.'

MBNA: 'Since it is two months past due, it already has been.'

Family Member: 'So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?'

MBNA: 'Either report her account to the frauds division or report her to the credit bureau, maybe both!'

Family Member: 'Do you think God will be mad at her?'

MBNA: 'Excuse me?'

Family Member: 'Did you just get what I was telling you? The part about her being dead?'

MBNA: 'Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor.'
Supervisor gets on the phone.

Family Member: 'I'm calling to tell you, she died in September.'

MBNA: 'The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply.'

Family Member: 'You mean you want to collect from her estate?'

MBNA: (Stammer) 'Are you her lawyer?'

Family Member: 'No, I'm her grandson'
Lawyer info given

MBNA: 'Could you fax us a certificate of death?'

Family Member: 'Sure.'
Fax number is given

After they get the fax:

MBNA: 'Our system just isn't set up for death. I don't know what more I can do to help.'

Family Member: 'Well, if you figure it out, great! If not, you could just keep billing her. I don't think she will care.'

MBNA: 'Well, the late fees and charges do still apply.'

Family Member: 'Would you like her new billing address?'

MBNA: 'That might help.'

Family Member: 'Heaton Cemetery, Heaton Road , Newcastle upon Tyne, Plot 1049.'

MBNA: 'Sir, that's a cemetery!'

Family Member: 'Well, what the **** do you do with dead people on your planet?'

MBNA were not available for comment when a reporter from the Newcastle Evening Chronicle rang.
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paganpaul: (Default)
I just laughed myself silly.

Radioshow, has a game in which the DJ asks a question and then people call the studio to respond and try to win a TV.

Girl calls and makes it to the DJ, who asks what the answer is. She says she doesn't know because she is in the car and she turned off the radio so she could call in peace. She did not hear the question...

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Nov. 4th, 2009 05:38 pm
paganpaul: (hhgtg)

Recently I received a warning about the use of this politically incorrect term, so please note:

We will need to be more sensitive in our choice of words.

I have been informed that the Islamic terrorists, who hate our guts and want to kill us all, do not like to be called ‘Towel heads’ since the item they wear on their heads is not actually a towel, but is in fact a small, folded sheet.

Therefore from this point forward, I shall be pleased to refer to them as ‘Little Sheet Heads’.

Thank you for your support and compliance in this matter.

April 2012

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